Mama, This Is What I Want You to Know About High School

Updated June 2025

You’ve been there through it all, Mama. And they need you to do a little more hard work. Just a bit more.

This stage doesn’t have to feel daunting or scary. I promise.

I could give you advice about choosing curriculum or dealing with the dreaded paperwork.
Those things are important parts of high school.

But what really helped me? It was nothing of that sort of advice.

My teen has shared what she wished she knew; now it’s Mom’s turn.

They’ll need you…maybe A LOT that first year

Remember those early years of homeschooling when they needed direct instruction for nearly all of every subject? And how drained you were by lunchtime?

Get ready, it’s back!

Now, it didn’t last long for us. But those first few months of high school for my daughter required so much help from me. So much! (Luckily, I had anticipated that and chose material for my boys that had them working more independently that semester.)

Nerves played a factor.
A jump in difficulty, too.
More demands on their schedule.
The realization that all of this “counts” toward their future.

Kiddo #2 is a totally different kind of student, and high school was a seamless transition that left me twiddling my thumbs a bit. And then came kiddo #3’s foray into high school. So much like his sister, I spent hours ‘at the elbow’ during his freshman year.

The jump to high school is big.

Besides all the developmental stuff going on, they’re building that awareness that school is serious.
They sense the weight of that.
They’re beginning that slow, natural separation.
And they can see graduation that is on the horizon (and the unknowns after that).

And you’re seeing & feeling all of those same things, with the added weight of being the mom & having 20+ years of life experience.

It’s like there’s a ‘doomsday’ clock sitting in the corner of your homeschool space. And it’s counting down to an end — the end of childhood, the end of homeschooling, the end of <insert whatever you’re envisioning>.

That moodiness or resistance they throw at you?
They’re seeing & feeling all of this, but without the life experience you have.
They’re figuring out who they are — apart from you — and what they want their adult life to look like.
They’re asking big questions that won’t have answers for years to come.

High school is a new stage for both of you. Give grace & patience to both of you.

Build their time management skills

I promise, this is an investment you want to make! I’ve heard this tip a lot, but I never read HOW to do it. And I don’t want to leave you without telling you what we did.

Two things, first…
1) I didn’t want to have her try things out and then have to help her fix her timing.
2) My goal was that she took complete control of her planning. She would figure out how much time it would take her, she’d figure out what she needed to do and when. For the courses we do completely at home, I wanted to be able to give her a unit of material and a deadline, she’d figure it out.

So, at the beginning of the year, I gave her a list of estimated times to complete her work for the week. This helped her to pace herself and stay focused. For the first few weeks, we tracked how much time she was actually spending on each subject.

Writing down what she actually accomplished during that time was key. She was able to learn how long to allot for a chapter of science or 20 pages of literature. Without learning her pacing, the timing didn’t tell us enough.

We also tracked what order she did her subjects in and evaluated how well it was working. She felt best when she got finished with math first, so we prioritized that. Moving into English next (before she started to lose focus) was a good second subject. Science and history, which didn’t take as much brainpower, were good subjects for right before and after lunch. And so on.

By mid-October, she was pretty accurate with her timing. By the second semester of 9th grade, she had it down. When 10th grade rolled around, we followed a similar process, but it took her far shorter time to figure it out. She’s never had a late assignment. (Unlike myself as a teen!)

Tools Aren’t Cheating

Were you like me as a teen? Did you skip reading your literature and, two days before it was due, go to the mall to pick up one of those familiar yellow-and-black books? (I was NOT the kind of student I want my kids to be!!) Cliff Notes and I were BFFs.

English is not my daughter’s easiest course, but she was doing okay. Until Shakespeare came up on the syllabus. I considered buying Cliff Notes for her, but I didn’t want to “cheat”. In searching for some kind of help, I stumbled upon SparkNotes. There, on their site, was the most helpful tool I could have imagined—a modern translation of Shakespeare!

I, again, fearing “cheating,” read the translation myself and then reworded it to her after she read each portion (and first tried to tell me in her own words what it said). After a few sections of this, I just gave it over to her. She would read the modern translation, then the same section in the original language, then back to the modern. It made all the difference.

It was a tool. And used as a tool rather than a lazy cheat is a fantastic way to aid a student’s learning.

A few years back, I came to the same conclusion regarding audiobooks. They aren’t a cheat just because she isn’t reading print books. So we use those, too. Speech-to-text can be a bridge for a teen who can articulate complex ideas out loud but freezes up when a keyboard or pencil is in their hand.

If the goal is for your student to learn, teach them how to do it…and give them the tools to do it well.

Work on paperwork before the year starts

Do as I say and not as I do, okay?

Before the year begins, get as much done with your kiddo’s paperwork as you can. Write notes for your course descriptions, enter this year’s courses into the transcripts so you can quickly add grades, etc.

Really, learn from my mistakes!

I slacked on course descriptions with kiddo #1, and senior-year-me paid for that. (See video below!)

With kiddos #2 & #3, I’ve made sure I “touch” their paperwork at least once a semester. I’ve added a few notes to each of their course descriptions every year, in case they need them for post-high school plans.

(Need some help knowing what paperwork you even need? I’ve got you covered.)

It’s almost over.

Mamas, you have spent years doing really hard work. You have but a few years left. In the blink of an eye, your teen will be launched. Always your baby, your young adult will be making their own place in the world. How do you want them to feel about those last few years at home?

As my daughter neared high school, I gave this a lot of thought.

1) I want her to know that I fully believe in her ability to learn. I want her to believe that she can tackle hard things. Equipping her with the tools to figure out what works for her and the confidence to seek out help are part of that.

2) I hope a gentle laugh comes to her when she thinks about our homeschool. I work hard to make our days include laughter and smiles. Our days shouldn’t be full of Mom getting on them about staying focused or completing their latest assignment. (High standards are part of our homeschool, don’t be mistaken, I just take a different approach.)

Be wise with your words, with your choices, with your expectations.

These years will be some of the most memorable for them.